Clare Josa

7 Musings On Self-Esteem

May 26, 2010 By Clare Josa Leave a Comment

Self-esteem is the cornerstone for feeling happier. Without it, any happiness we experience will usually be dependent on things we can’t control – like how others behave and what goes on in the world around us.

But nobody teaches us how to have self-esteem. So how do we go about getting some?

Strengthening our sense of self-worth can often be a challenging journey. We’re trying to break habits we’ve been developing since our early years.

So, to help along the way, and hopefully provide some inspiration, here are 7 of my favourite musings on self-esteem.

“How you treat yourself is how others will treat you.“

If you don’t look after yourself, the outside world will spot it – and make assumptions about how you want to be treated. “Do unto yourself as you would have others do unto you,” might make a good motto?

“No one can make you feel inferior, without your consent.“ Eleanor Roosevelt.

I throw this one back at myself, every time I catch myself grumbling about something someone else has said or done to upset me – and it works! It’s about taking back your personal power and accepting responsibility for how you feel.

“Only you can make the decision on how bad you’re going to feel.“

And while we’re on the topic of choosing how we feel, we’re the only ones who can decide how deep that trough goes!

“All criticism is borne of someone else’s pain.“ Native American saying.

If someone has a go at you, it’s because they’re hurting inside and don’t want to face it. Think about it, when we’re in a happy mood, full of sunshine and smiles, we don’t go around criticising others, do we? So that’s a great excuse not to take it personally…

“Don’t bother waiting for others to respect you.“

If you wait for others to respect you, you’ll have a long wait. People pick up a lack of self-respect just like a dog can sniff out fear. And it’s tough to earn others’ respect if you haven’t yet given it to yourself yet.

“Forgiveness is the key to feeling good.“

Holding on to resentment and anger keeps you trapped in the pattern of negative emotions that leaves you feeling bad. Forgiving the other person for their behaviour doesn’t mean letting them off. It’s about setting yourself free from the pain and moving on. And remember, the last one we get round to forgiving is ourself.

“Self-respect is about acting with integrity.“

It’s not about how you look, how clever you are or how great your job is. Self-respect is about being able to fall asleep at night with a clear conscience; knowing you have acted with integrity, kindness and compassion during your day; knowing you were true to who you really are.

What are your top tips and secret strategies for self-esteem? How about sharing them via the comments box, below?

And if you enjoy short-n-sweet inspirational quotes, you might like to get hold of our free Daily Sunshine emails.

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: Inspiring Quotes, self esteem, self respect, self worth

10 Happiness Secrets From A 4 Year-Old

May 21, 2010 By Clare Josa Leave a Comment

If you want to feel happier, sometimes it can be best to go back to basics and learn from those around us who seem happiest. In my life, that’s probably my 4 year old.

He seems to have happiness pretty much sussed.

We often believe that wisdom comes with age. But sometimes the years cause us to forget what’s really important, as we get bogged down in the details of how to worry, stress and feel grumpy. We can focus so much on teaching our kids the things we think we know, that we can forget how much they have to teach us.

So, just in case you’re up for remembering how to feel happier, here are 10 happiness secrets that my wee one would like to share with us “grown ups”!

[Read more...]

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: happiness, how to feel happier, wisdom

How Does Vibrant Energy Therapy Set You Free?

December 5, 2009 By Clare Josa Leave a Comment

So many of us spend a lifetime searching for happiness, inner peace and a sense of freedom. Yet even if we achieve those dreams, it’s often just a fleeting experience. Yet there’s a secret out there that could open the door to freedom to all of us – right now. Interested? It’s called Vibrant Energy Therapy.

Want to find out how it can set you free?

Click on the image below to download a Vibrant Energy Therapy Leaflet. Enjoy!

Vibrant Energy Therapy - Read All About It

Filed Under: Vibrant Energy Therapy, featured Tagged With: Freedom, Vibrant Energy Therapy

Are You Ready To Set Yourself Free?

November 19, 2009 By Clare Josa 1 Comment

Inner peace, stillness, happiness – whatever you choose to call it – comes from knowing that, in every moment, we are totally free. Nothing and no one can constrain us without our consent.

But how many of us actually believe that?

Even if we aren’t able to choose what we are doing or external circumstances, we are always free to choose how we respond – that’s real freedom.

Over the years, we pick up beliefs, habits and thought patterns that block our freedom; that make it hard for us to believe we can choose anything in our lives; that shut us down. And we don’t even realise it.

So, instead of soaring like an eagle, our fears and unconsciously held beliefs mean we feel trapped – and anything BUT free.

A life without freedom is a life of suffering. We limit ourselves, based on past experiences and fears, or assumptions and worries about the future. We allow our past to control the present moment – which is the only time we ever have – by being unable to see that in every single moment and with every breath – and every heartbeat – we can choose freedom:

Freedom from past limits
Freedom from the shackles of our history – and the stories we tell
Freedom from the boxes we have put ourselves in and from the labels we chose – or were given
Freedom from having to think or beahve the way we did decades ago, months ago, last week or even one minute ago
Freedom to let go of all the erroneous assumptions, beliefs and excuses, so we can open up our hearts to become who we really are, recognising our true beauty – the inner radiance we have spent a lifetime hiding

All of this is within your reach – right here, right now.
Freedom has been patiently waiting for you, all of your life.

The question is:

Are you ready to let go and allow yourself to be free?

If you’re truly ready to let go of the blocks and allow yourself to experience a life of freedom, but would like some support, contact Clare via the contact us page to find out whether a one-to-one session might be a helpful next step for you.

Filed Under: Vibrant Energy Therapy Tagged With: Freedom, Vibrant Energy Therapy

Law Of Attraction Not Working For You? Here Are The Answers?

October 30, 2009 By Clare Josa 1 Comment

If you have found that the Law Of Attraction / Manifesting hasn’t been producing the results you were hoping for, in “Consciousness – The New Currency” Brandon and Kevin not only explain why; they take you step by step through processes to help you clear out the blocks you didn’t even know you had. Sound interesting, perhaps? That’s why it’s our November Book Of The Month.

“Consciousness – The New Currency” has the potential to change your life – if you’re ready to roll up your sleeves and follow its suggestions.

Brandon and Kevin make it clear that the world needs a massive shift in consciousness – and the time is now. And that shift has to come from each of us personally taking resposibility for clearing out our blocks and opening up to consciousness and Grace (God / The Universe / Collective Consciousness), to lead lives that spread love, not fear; becoming who we really are.

(If those words turn you off, then this might not be the book for you!)

It’s not an easy option.

It requires you to choose to be ready to let go of excuses and beliefs that have been holding you back for years. Yet the process to release them is deeply effective and healing.

In this book, which follows on from Brandon’s best-selling books The Journey and Freedom is…, Brandon teams up with her partner Kevin, and they help you go a level deeper.

It builds on previous “Journey Work” (or “process work”, as it’s called in the book). Journey Work is about going deeply into the emotions we experience, that tell us we have hit a block in life, so we can release the block. A block is something – an experience, vow or belief – from the past that we’re usually not consciously aware of, which sabotages our best efforts to be who we really are and achieve our dreams.

Most of us try to make changes using will power or positive affirmations – or other positive thinking techniques. Yet these often don’t produce the results we wanted.

Why?

Because they set up a conflict between the conscious, thinking mind and the unconscious mind (which actually runs the show).

For example, the conscious mind’s positive affirmation says “I’m going to get that great job”, whilst the unconscious mind firmly believes that “I’m too stupid / I don’t deserve it / I’m not attractive enough.”

This is why so many of us create what we want but, at some point, sabotage it. Brandon and Kevin help the reader identify these unconscious blocks and show you, step by step, how to release them. (Aside: Bruce Lipton explains the biology behind this conscious / unconscious conflict really well in The Biology of Belief).

In “Consciousness – The New Currency” Brandon and Kevin bring us, for the first time, the processes used in their hugely powerful Manifest Abundance retreats. It’s transformational and only for those who are ready to undergo healing at a deep level, in order to liberate themselves from every limiting pattern / unconscious block that has held them back.

Throughout this book, Brandon and Kevin share their personal stories – warts and all – to help the reader understand what is really on offer to those who break free of their limitations. Between them, they share experiences that cover pretty much every block and emotion you could imagine. It’s an incredibly human book and is written with love and compassion.

If you’ve not yet come across Brandon and Kevin, though, it may challenge many of your assumptions about life. For them, concepts such as handing your life over to Grace (God / The Universe / Higher Spirit) and only living your Truth are at the core of their Being. This may be challenging for some.

Also, there is an assumption that the reader is at least vaguely familiar with the Law Of Attraction / Manifesting. If a reader is still at a point where they feel that life “happens to them” and other people can “make them angry”, then they may find this book brings up some resistance!

Is this book for you?

If you’ve read The Secret or similar books and want to understand why the techniques they teach can produce hit and miss results, then this book could clear things up for you. It explains why positive thinking isn’t enough and helps you go deeper into setting yourself free from every limitation you’ve ever picked up.
If you’re already a fan of Brandon Bays, then you’ll enjoy this. She really builds on her previous work and it’s lovely to have Kevin’s input into this book, too.
If you’re really new to all this, you might prefer to read The Journey first, although “Consciousness” is still a great place to start.

If you do choose to read “Consciousness – The New Currency”, then I hope you find it inspiring and that it helps you liberate your true potential, transforming your life.

Welcome to the ride!

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: book review, heal your life, law of attraction, transoformation

Could You Be In Glastonbury On 31st October?

October 24, 2009 By Clare Josa Leave a Comment

Glastonbury Empowerment With Natalie Fee

Could you be in Glastonbury on 31st October 2009?

If yes, here’s an opportunity you won’t want to miss.

Natalie Fee is a wonderful soul who has a knack of understanding what people need, when it comes to their spiritual development.

Here’s what she’s planning on October 31st:

❧ Receive the energy you need to go beyond current challenges
❧ Increase your awareness of what you need to do, and cultivate the energy to act on it!
❧ Learn simple practices to transform difficult situations into higher energy
❧ Spend time in nature, with like-minded people
❧ Take a day to connect with your true nature, through meditation, song and silence
❧ Create, dream and connect with your with your vision for the coming winter months
❧ Eat, drink (optional!) and be merry (recommended) – and finish the day at the fabulous Chalice Well event: Celebrating Autumn’s Burning and the Darkening of the Year (where Natalie will also be performing some of her poetry)

£99.00

Includes:
Personalised Empowerment Cards – how each empowerment works for you
Pre-Empowerment Tour questionnaire and guidance
Lunch and Evening Meals – organic, local produce
Mulled Wine
Entrance Fee to Glastonbury Abbey
Evening Ticket to the Chalice Well event

Interested? You can find out more on Natalie’s website and book your place: Weaving Star

If you manage to get along, we hope you have a wonderful time!

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: empowerment, event, natalie fee

Back In A Jiffy?

October 12, 2009 By Clare Josa 1 Comment

Are you, like me, one of those who believes (or used to believe) that life is about effort, trying your best and getting results? Find out why I thought I’d be ‘back in a jiffy’ but ended up spending 3 weeks in bed!

Do you ever get the sense that ‘life’ knows better?

Does it ever take you weeks to take the hint, though?

That’s what has been happening to me in the last month.

Is it time for a break?

About 5 weeks ago, I got a sense that I needed to “allow” myself to be ill, to clear something.

As a part-time writer and coach and a full-time mum to two children under 5, the thought of letting myself “take time off” to be ill seemed ridiculous.

But, 3 weeks ago, it happened.

My body literally took me to bed. We’re not talking about cosy covers, hot cups of tea and catching up on good books. We’re talking fevers, flu (proper flu, not man flu!), chest infection and sinusitis! We’re talking dark room, groaning and feeling awful!

To top things off, we had builders in for the first week, fixing the wobbly chimneys, so the house was full of banging and the main rooms were taped off like a crime scene, to reduce soot staining. The following week, different builders were working to replace the entire leaking water main – more banging, crashing, digging and no water for stretches at a time.

It really wasn’t a great time to be ill.

But that’s when my body picked.

Why?

Because I needed a break – I had been working too hard – and it needed to pick up a bug to clear out some stuff.

Rather than doing it over the summer, when the weather was lovely and there were plenty of people with free time to support, I kept putting it off until I could do so no longer!

It caused chaos for my wonderful family, who rallied round to look after the kids, sometimes driving over 100 miles a day to help out. By the time this is done I’ll have taken an entire month off work – very much enforced!

So what have I learned from all this?

That it’s critical to pay attention to the warning signs, before life sweeps you off your feet.

If you think you’re feeling rough and have been working too hard, then it is time to stop!

Back in a jiffy?

You might think you can’t take an afternoon off – or even just a couple of hours… But if you don’t nurture yourself, no one else will.

And surely it’s better to be “back in a jiffy” than “see you next month”?

Is there a reason why you’re reading this today?

Is it time to give yourself a break?

If you want to create magic in your life, you have to look after yourself, first.

With love,

Clare x

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: benefit of illness, early warning signs, take a break

Why Are We So Scared Of Changing?

September 10, 2009 By Clare Josa Leave a Comment

Have you ever wondered why so many of us go along putting up with things we don’t like about our life, but doing nothing about it?

You see it all the time.

Does changing feel like climbing a mountain? “I hate my job,” says a friend, “but there’s nothing else out there.”

“I don’t really like this house, but I can’t afford to move.”

“My girlfriend and I aren’t really that happy any more, but I don’t want to break up with her.”

It seems to be an accepted fact that change is bad. Scary. Not to be done. We build change up into such a big thing that we become paralysed in its wake.

We build up watertight excuses and beliefs around that change, to stop us from having to take any action. We pretend the change is a huge mountain that we couldn’t possibly climb, so we turn our back on it.

So we go on, day becoming week becoming month and then year, putting up with things that make us feel miserable, forgetting what it felt like to have our heart sing, because that might require change.

But then there comes a day when something snaps and the scales tip. We realise we have to do something. We can’t leave things as they are. And we take steps to make that change.

When working with clients, it’s easy to spot those who are ready to change – and do – and those who aren’t yet ready – so won’t. And nowadays I can finally see it in myself, too. And no one can force you to be ready to change.

Change can’t happen until the pain of changing becomes less than the pain of staying the same.

Or, as Anasis Nin beautifullly puts it:

And the day came when the risk to remain a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. ~ Anasis Nin

We build the fear of change into something of such great proportions that we numb out the pain of staying the same. We use all sorts of creative excuses and behaviours to pretend we don’t mind. We eat too much, drink too much, smoke, go out too much, get angry, drive too fast, exercise too much, even meditate too much – all trying to block out the pain of our reality, because we’re so scared of changing.

What Can We Do?

The first step towards being able to change is to understand what – specifically – we are scared of.
Writing down a list can help stop our inner critic from creating even more drama.
Then, for each item on your list, be really objective – is it “real” – or is it just the projection of a scared Ego-mind?
Usually we find that very little of it is real.
Once you have got your fears back under control, you can start looking at the excuses you’re using to avoid having to change.
They’re usually deeply-held beliefs that we picked up years ago, that protect us from ever having to get out of our comfort zone… Wayne Dyer has a great audio CD on how to let go of excuses that have been holding us back (a recording of a 2 day workshop), if you fancy some support on that one. Have to admit I’m still listening to this set in the car and finding it inspiring.
Then, it’s about deciding whether you really want the change. And, if you do, breaking it down into baby steps.
The Dalai Lama reminds us that if you stand really close to any problem in life, you can successfully make it look enormous. But if you step back and get things into perspective, it always looks smaller and more manageable.

Being scared of making a change is just our unconscious mind’s way of telling us the change is important to us, but outside of our comfort zone.

And yet nothing always stays the same. Change is an essential part of living and growing. Without it, we would stagnate. It’s being attached to the present and worrying about the future that makes it scary. And, deep down, we know we have a choice about both of those, don’t we?

What is there in your life, today, that you might be ready to change? And how could you take that first step? I’d love to hear your thoughts via the comments box.

Thank you!

Clare

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: change, fear, no more excuses, ready to change

Do You Need To De-Stress?

September 9, 2009 By Clare Josa

Is your mind racing? Are you stressed out? Running around, doing too much, finding it hard to switch off?

If you’re finding it tough to relax but secretly know your body – and mind – are craving a refresh, you might like to try doing a deep relaxation.

“Just relax!” Easy to say. But how do you do it?

If your mind is racing, it can be really hard to relax and that’s why many people find it easier to work with a guided relaxation on CD or audio, so that someone else talks you through the relaxation process.

Did you know…?

Did you know that deep relaxation is best achieved by going through the body in a certain order and then working with the mind? There are specialist techniques you can use to achieve a relaxed, calm and de-stressed state quickly and easily.

Want An Expert To Guide You Through The Process?

Time to de-stress?

Due to popular demand, we have now recorded one of our deep relaxations as an MP3 file for you to download. You can listen to it on your computer, your MP3 player or burn it to a CD and relax, whenever you want to.

It takes you, step by step, through a physical relaxation process, then a mind relaxation process, to help you get to a place of inner calm- no matter how stressed you are currently feeling.

In just 20 minutes, it will leave you feeling more relaxed, peaceful, less stressed and more energised.

You can listen to it at any point during the day – or last thing at night, before falling asleep. Just make sure you NEVER listen to it whilst driving or doing any other, obvious, activity during which being deeply relaxed might be a bad idea… Sorry – we have to mention that disclaimer!

Fact: doing a deep relaxation before going to sleep will improve the quality of your sleep and reduce stress-related night-waking.

Fact: doing a regular deep relaxation can improve your health.

Fact: doing a daily deep relaxation will increase your energy levels, leaving you feeling more vital and alert.

The deep relaxation is led by Clare Josa, who is a formally trained meditation teacher, who is also an expert in using NLP-based specialist language techniques to help you relax easily and deeply at an unconscious level.

We chose NOT to use the “traditional” new age, tinkly background music on this track, because many people find it off-putting. So what you’re getting is pure, deep relaxation.

If you would like to give it a go, you can download this Deep Relaxtion MP3 now, as our gift (it’s usually £6.99).

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: calm, deep relaxation MP3, destress, feel calmer, inner peace, meditation MP3

Living The Tao – A Year’s Journey

September 3, 2009 By Clare Josa 1 Comment

When you change the way you look at the world, you change your experience of life.
That’s a belief that lies behind many spiritual and personal development practices.

But How Do You Do It?
How do you change the way you look at the world?

You change the way you look at the world by changing the way you think.

But how do you change the way you think?
By allowing yourself to challenge your long-held beliefs, assumptions, excuses and habitual behaviours. It’s time to see whether they’re now out of date – then to allow yourself to try new ones on for size.

… by letting go of our preconceptions, habits and expectations; by living in the moment and choosing to see what really is; rather than what we perceive; by getting our Ego-mind out of the way.

I’m always up for pushing back the boundaries of my beliefs and clearing away Ego-baggage, which is probably why I’ve been so good at attracting suitable experiences into my life over the years

I believe (ooh – dangerous word!) that personal and spiritual growth depends on us looking in the mirror and stripping away what is no longer serving our highest good, like peeling off layers of the onion.

And I now feel I’ve reached a stage where I’m ready to undertake the project – or experiment – that I’m going to living for the next year.

lotus-bud-150-150 I intend to “live” the Tao Te Ching.
For those of you who aren’t yet familiar with this ancient book, the Tao (pronounced “Dow” as in “Dow Jones”) was written by Lao Tzu (Chinese for Old Man) about 2,500 years ago and is felt to contain ancient wisdom and Universal Truths in its 81 verses.
Although it can be read in an afternoon, the real benefit comes from applying its wisdom to your daily life and allowing yourself to “try on” the meanings of each verse – even though they can appear somewhat mind-bending to Western thinking.
This is a truly challenging and stretching experience.

How Am I Going To “Live” The Tao Te Ching?
Each week – or so – I will be studying one of the verses, taking each in turn. I’ll be working with various translations.
I’ll be “living” each verse, as though it were truth – and seeing how it changes things.
I’ll be sharing my experiences of all this via the Beyond Alchemy blog. It’s not my intention to tell you what to think. I am not asking you to believe anything I write. Instead I am hoping that some of the insights might resonate with you and inspire you to take your own journey, deeper into experiencing who you really are and letting go of the beliefs and behaviours that have held you back.

My intention is to offer an interpretation of the Tao Te Ching for 21st Century concerns, bringing you tools to help you apply it in your life today, as transformational techniques.

If you’d like to join me on this journey or follow the progress, make sure you bookmark this link:
Living TheTao

See you there!
Clare x

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: tao alchemy, tao te ching, year with the tao

Beyond Alchemy | Clare Josa